A Lawyer and a Senior

A lawyer and a senior citizen are sitting next to each other on a long
flight.

The lawyer is thinking that seniors are so dumb that he could get one over on
them easily.

So, the lawyer asks if the senior would like to play a fun game.

The senior is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and
tries to catch a few winks.

The lawyer persists, saying that the game is a lot of fun….”I ask you a
question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me only $5.00. Then you
ask me one, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.00,” he says.

This catches the senior’s attention and, to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees
to play the game.

The lawyer asks the first question. “What’s the distance from the Earth to
the Moon?”

The senior doesn’t say a word, but reaches into his pocket, pulls out a
five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.

Now, it’s the senior’s turn. He asks the lawyer, “What goes up a hill with
three legs, and comes down with four?”

The lawyer uses his laptop to search all references he can find on the Net.

He sends E-mails to all the smart friends he knows; all to no avail. After an
hour of searching, he finally gives up.

He wakes the senior and hands him $500.00. The senior pockets the $500.00 and
goes right back to sleep.

The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes the senior up and
asks, “Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with
four?”

The senior reaches into his pocket, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to
sleep.

You know you’re going to send this one on.
Don’t mess with old folks

 

A neat power point of some awesome sandstone formations

 

Coyote_Buttes_in_Utah_Arizona_11

 

Very interesting……

For those of us who grew up with “Kilroy” in our youthful years, we knew the story but here it is for those who have the curiosity to now know the real “Kilroy”!

How many of you remember Kilroy? Kilroy was a legend during WWII andafterward some of the fame lingered. Here is the story. 

This is interesting … I have often wondered about Kilroy … now I know. Great piece of history. Anyone born in the mid thirties (or earlier) knew Kilroy. We didn’t know why but we had lapel pins with his nose hanging over the label and the top of his face above his nose with his hands hanging over the label too. I believe it was orange colored. No one knew why he was so well known but we all joined in. Kind of a war story, now we know.

KILROY WAS HERE. WHO THE HECK WAS KILROY? In 1946 the American Transit Association, through its radio program, “Speak to America,” sponsored a nationwide contest to find the REAL Kilroy, offering a prize of a real trolley car to the person who could prove himself to be the genuine article.

Almost 40 men stepped forward to make that claim, but only James Kilroy from Halifax, Massachusetts, had evidence of his identity.

Kilroy was a 46-year old shipyard worker during the war who worked as a checker at the Fore River Shipyard in Quincy. His job was to go around and check on the number of rivets completed. Riveters were on piecework and got paid by the rivet.

Kilroy would count a block of rivets and put a check mark in semi-waxed lumber chalk, so the rivets wouldn’t be counted twice. When Kilroy went off duty, the riveters would erase the mark. Later on, an off-shift inspector would come through and count the rivets a second time, resulting in double pay for the riveters.

One day Kilroy’s boss called him into his office. The foreman was upset about all the wages being paid to riveters, and asked him to investigate. It was then he realized what had been going on.

The tight spaces he had to crawl in to check the rivets didn’t lend themselves to lugging around a paint can and brush, so Kilroy decided to stick with the waxy chalk. He continued to put his checkmark on each job he inspected, but added KILROY WAS HERE in king-sized letters next to the check, and eventually added the sketch of the chap with the long nose peering over the fence and that became part of the Kilroy message. Once he did that, the riveters stopped trying to wipe away his marks.

Ordinarily the rivets and chalk marks would have been covered up with paint. With war on, however, ships were leaving the Quincy Yard so fast that there wasn’t time to paint them. As a result, Kilroy’s inspection “trademark” was seen by thousands of servicemen who boarded the troopships the yard produced. His message apparently rang a bell with the servicemen, because they picked it up and spread it all over Europe and the South Pacific. Before war’s end, “Kilroy” had been here, there, and everywhere on the long hauls to Berlin and Tokyo.

To the troops outbound in those ships, however, he was a complete mystery; all they knew for sure was that some jerk named Kilroy had “been there first.” As a joke, U.S. servicemen began placing the graffiti wherever they landed, claiming it was already there when they arrived.

Kilroy became the U.S. super-GI who had always “already been” wherever GIs went. It became a challenge to place the logo in the most unlikely places imaginable (it is said to        be atop Mt. Everest, the Statue of Liberty, the underside of the Arc De Triumphe, and even scrawled in the dust on the moon).

As the war went on, the legend grew. Underwater demolition teams routinely sneaked ashore Japanese-held islands in the Pacific to map the terrain for coming invasions by U.S. troops (and thus, presumably, were the first GI’s there). On one occasion, however, they reported seeing enemy troops painting over the Kilroy logo. In 1945, an outhouse was built for the exclusive use of Roosevelt, Stalin, and Churchill at the Potsdam conference. Its first occupant was Stalin, who emerged and asked his aide (in Russian), “Who is Kilroy?”

To help prove his authenticity in 1946, James Kilroy brought along officials from the shipyard and some of the riveters. He won the trolley car, which he gave to his nine children as a Christmas gift and set it up as a playhouse in the Kilroy front yard in Halifax, Massachusetts.

If you check the WWII memorial in Washington DC, you will see Kilroy peeking over a wall.

          So, now you know!

 

 

BYE BYE SR-71 BLACKBIRD


FROM AN SR-71 PILOT…….Very interesting read….
SR-71 Blackbird

In April 1986, following an attack on American
soldiers in a   Berlin disco, President Reagan
ordered the bombing of Muammar Qaddafi’s
terrorist camps in   Libya ..


My duty was to fly over Libya , and take
photographs recording the damage our F-111′s
had inflicted.


Qaddafi had established a ‘line of death,’
a territorial marking across the   Gulf of Sidra ,
swearing to shoot down any intruder, that crossed
the boundary.


On the morning of April 15, I rocketed past the line at 2,125 mph.

I was piloting the SR-71 spy plane, the world’s
fastest jet, accompanied by a Marine Major (Walt),
the aircraft’s reconnaissance systems officer (RSO).

We had crossed into Libya , and were approaching
our final turn over the bleak desert landscape, when
Walt informed me, that he was receiving missile
launch signals.


I quickly increased our speed, calculating the time
it would take for the weapons, most likely SA-2 and SA-4
surface-to-air missiles, capable of Mach 5 – to reach
our altitude.
I estimated, that we could beat the rocket-powered
missiles to the turn, and stayed our course, betting
our lives on the plane’s performance.


After several agonizingly long seconds, we made
the turn and blasted toward the Mediterranean …

‘You might want to pull it back,’ Walt suggested.
It was then that I noticed I still had the throttles
full forward.


The plane was flying a mile every 1.6 seconds, well
above our Mach 3.2 limit.


It was the fastest we would ever fly.


I pulled the throttles to idle, just south of   Sicily ,
but we still overran the refueling tanker, awaiting us
over   Gibraltar …


Scores of significant aircraft have been produced,
in the 100 years of flight, following the achievements
of the Wright brothers, which we celebrate in
December.


Aircraft such as the Boeing 707, the F-86 Sabre Jet,
and the P-51 Mustang, are among the important machines,
that have flown our skies.


But the SR-71, also known as the Blackbird, stands alone
as a significant contributor to Cold War victory, and as the
fastest plane ever, and only 93 Air Force pilots, ever steered
the ‘sled,’ as we called our aircraft.

The SR-71, was the brainchild of Kelly Johnson,
the famed Lockheed designer, who created the
P-38, the F-104 Starfighter, and the U-2.


After the Soviets shot down Gary Powers U-2 in 1960,
Johnson began to develop an aircraft, that would
fly three miles higher, and five times faster, than
the spy plane, and still be capable of photographing
your license plate.


However, flying at 2,000 mph would create intense heat
on the aircraft’s skin.
Lockheed engineers used a titanium alloy, to construct
more than 90 percent of the SR-71, creating special tools,
and manufacturing procedures to hand-build each of the
(40 planes..  (WoW ! ! ! 40 planes???? I thought only 7.)
Special heat-resistant fuel, oil, and hydraulic fluids, that
would function at 85,000 feet, and higher, also had to be
developed.

In 1962, the first Blackbird successfully flew, and
in 1966, the same year I graduated from high school,
the Air Force began flying operational SR-71 missions.

I came to the program in 1983, with a sterling record
and a recommendation from my commander,
completing the weeklong interview, and meeting
Walt, my partner for the next four years.


He would ride four feet behind me, working all the
cameras, radios, and electronic jamming equipment.


I joked, that if we were ever captured, he was the spy,
and I was just the driver.


He told me to keep the pointy end forward.

We trained for a year, flying out of Beale AFB in
California , Kadena Airbase in Okinawa , and RAF
Mildenhall in England ..


On a typical training mission, we would take off near
Sacramento , refuel over Nevada , accelerate into Montana ,
obtain a high Mach speed over Colorado , turn right over
New Mexico, speed across the Los Angeles Basin, run up
the West Coast, turn right at Seattle , then return to Beale.


Total flight time:- Two Hours and Forty Minutes.

One day, high above   Arizona , we were monitoring
the radio traffic, of all the mortal airplanes below us.
First, a Cessna pilot asked the air traffic controllers
to check his ground speed. ‘Ninety knots,’ ATC replied.
A Bonanza soon made the same request.
‘One-twenty on the ground,’ was the reply.


To our surprise, a navy F-18 came over the radio, with a
ground speed check.


I knew exactly what he was doing.


Of course, he had a ground speed indicator in his cockpit,
but he wanted to let all the bug-smashers in the valley,
know what real speed was, ‘Dusty 52, we show you at 620
on the ground,’ ATC responded.

The situation was too ripe.


I heard the click of Walt’s mike button in the rear seat.
In his most innocent voice, Walt startled the controller
by asking for a ground speed check from 81,000 feet,
clearly above controlled airspace.
In a cool, professional voice, the controller replied,
‘Aspen 20, I show you at 1,982 knots on the ground.’
We did not hear another transmission on that
frequency, all the way to the coast.

The Blackbird always showed us something new,
each aircraft possessing its own unique personality.

In time, we realized we were flying a national treasure.


When we taxied out of our revetments for take-off,
people took notice.


Traffic congregated near the airfield fences, because
everyone wanted to see, and hear the mighty SR-71.


You could not be a part of this program, and not come
to love the airplane.


Slowly, she revealed her secrets to us, as we earned
her trust..

One moonless night, while flying a routine training
mission over the Pacific, I wondered what the sky
would look like from 84,000 feet, if the cockpit lighting
were dark.


While heading home on a straight course, I slowly turned
down all of the lighting, reducing the glare and revealing
the night sky.

Within seconds, I turned the lights back up, fearful that the
jet would know, and somehow punish me.


But my desire to see the sky, overruled my caution,
I dimmed the lighting again.


To my amazement, I saw a bright light outside
my window.


As my eyes adjusted to the view, I realized that the
brilliance was the broad expanse of the Milky Way,
now a gleaming stripe across the sky.

Where dark spaces in the sky, had usually existed,
there were now dense clusters, of sparkling stars.


Shooting Stars, flashed across the canvas every
few seconds.


It was like a fireworks display with no sound.

I knew I had to get my eyes back on the instruments,
and reluctantly, I brought my attention back inside.


To my surprise, with the cockpit lighting still off,
I could see every gauge, lit by starlight.


In the plane’s mirrors, I could see the eerie shine of
my gold spacesuit, incandescently illuminated, in a
celestial glow.


I stole one last glance out the window.
Despite our speed, we seemed still before the
heavens, humbled in the radiance of a much greater
power.


For those few moments, I felt a part of something far
more significant, than anything we were doing in the plane.


The sharp sound of Walt’s voice on the radio, brought me
back to the tasks at hand, as I prepared for our descent.

San Diego  Aerospace   Museum
The SR-71 was an expensive aircraft to operate.
The most significant cost was tanker support, and in 1990, confronted with budget cutbacks, the Air
Force retired the SR-71.
The SR-71 served six presidents, protecting America
for a quarter of a century.


Unbeknown to most of the country, the plane flew
over North Vietnam, Red China, North Korea, the
Middle East, South Africa, Cuba, Nicaragua, Iran, Libya,
and the Falkland Islands.
On a weekly basis, the SR-71, kept watch over every
Soviet Nuclear Submarine, Mobile Missile Site,
and all of their troop movements.
It was a key factor in winning the Cold War.

I am proud to say, I flew about 500 hours in this
aircraft.
I knew her well.
She gave way to no plane, proudly dragging her
Sonic Boom through enemy backyards, with great impunity.
She defeated every missile, outran every MiG, and always
brought us home.


In the first 100 years of manned flight, no aircraft was more remarkable.
The Blackbird had outrun nearly 4,000 missiles,
not once taking a scratch from enemy fire.

On her final flight, the Blackbird, destined for
the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum ,
sped from Los Angeles to Washington
in 64 Minutes, averaging 2,145 mph, and
setting four speed records.

 

 
Humor of Uncle Thurzel:

Uncle Thurzel loved to fish. When he was 80 years old, he was sitting in his boat fishing when he heard a voice say, “Pick me up.”

 

He looked around and couldn’t see anyone. He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say again, “Pick me up.”

 

He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog.

 

Thurzel said, “Are you talking to me?”

 

The frog said, “Yes, I’m talking to you. Pick me up then, kiss me and I’ll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen. I’ll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous because I will be your bride!”

 

Thurzel looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up carefully, and placed it in his front breast pocket.

 

Then the frog said, “Didn’t you hear what I said? I said kiss me and I will be your beautiful bride.”

 

He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said, “Nah, at my age I’d rather have a talking frog.”

 

With age comes wisdom.

 (Thurzel is Joseph’s uncle. Not all stories about Uncle Thurzel are true, but they could be.)

 

I don’t care who you are…. This is  Funny!!

The United  States Air Force – solving problems since  1947!  

 

FORGET THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE – OK?

BUT…

This is very thought-provoking!!

FORGET THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE
HOW ABOUT ONE PIECE OF EVIDENCE THAT THE IMPOSToR EVER EXISTED

OK… this is past the ‘birthers’ questions.
BUT this is just plain old common sense, no political agendas for either side.
Just common knowledge that citizens of a country and especially American citizens who even know that: Andrew Jackson’s wife smoked a corn cob pipe and was accused of adultery or that Lincoln never went to school or Kennedy wore a back brace or Truman played the piano.

Good grief… we are Americans! We are known for our humanitarian interests and caring for our ‘fellow man’. We care, but none of us know one single humanizing
fact about the history of our own president. Honestly, and this is a personal thing…
but it’s niggled at me for ages that no one who ever dated him ever showed up. The simple fact of his charisma that caused the women to be drawn to him so obviously during his campaign, looks like some lady would not have missed the opportunity….
We all know about JFK’s magnetism, McCain was no monk, Palin’s courtship
and even her athletic prowess were probed… Biden’s aneurisms are no secret.
Look at Cheney and Clinton… we all know about their heart problems and certainly speaking of the opposite sex- how could I have left out ‘Wild Bill’ before or during the White House?
Nope… not one lady has stepped up and said, “He was sooo shy…”
or “What a great dancer!!” Now look at the rest of this… no classmates,
not even the recorder for the Columbia class notes ever heard of him….

…. I just dunno about this fellow.

Who was the best man at his wedding?
Start there. Then check groomsmen.
Then get the footage of the graduation ceremony.
Has anyone talked to the professors?
It is odd that no one is bragging that they knew him or taught him
or lived with him.

When did he meet Michele and how? Are there photos there?
Every president gives to the public all their photos, etc. for their library, etc. What has he released? And who in hell voted for him to be the
most popular man in 2010????

Does this make you wonder?

Ever wonder why no one ever came forward from President Obama’s past
saying they knew him, attended school with him, was his friend, etc. ??
Not one person has ever come forward from his past.

VERY, VERY STRANGE…
This should really be a cause for great concern. To those who voted for him, you may have elected an unqualified, inexperienced shadow man.
Did you see a picture called The Manchurian Candidate?…

Let’s face it. As insignificant as we all are… someone whom we went to school with remembers our name or face … someone remembers we
were the clown or the dork or the brain or the quiet one or the bully
or something about us.

George Stephanopoulos of ABC News said the same thing during the 2008 campaign. He questions why no one has acknowledged the president was in their classroom or ate in the same cafeteria or made impromptu speeches on campus.
Stephanopoulos also was a classmate of Obama at Columbia –
the class of 1984. He says he never had a single class with him.

While he is such a great orator, why doesn’t anyone in Obama’s college class
remember him?
And, why won’t he allow Columbia to release his records?

NOBODY REMEMBERS OBAMA AT COLUMBIA !!!

Looking for evidence of Obama’s past, Fox News contacted 400 Columbia University students from the period when Obama claims to have been there,
but none remembered him.

Wayne Allyn Root was, like Obama, a political science major at Columbia
who also graduated in 1983. In 2008, Root says of Obama;
“I don’t know a single person at Columbia that knew him, and they
all know me. I don’t have a classmate who ever knew Barack Obama
at Columbia .. EVER!

Nobody recalls him. Root adds that he was also, like Obama, “Class of ’83 political science, pre-law” and says, “You don’t get more exact or closer than that.”
Never met him in my life, don’t know anyone who ever met him.
At the class reunion, our 20th reunion five years ago, who was asked to be the
speaker of the class? Me. No one ever heard of Barack! And five years ago, nobody even knew who he was. The guy who writes the class notes,
who’s kind of the, as we say in New York , ‘the macha’ who knows everybody,
has yet to find a person, a human who ever met him.”

Obama’s photograph does not appear in the school’s yearbook and Obama consistently declines requests to talk about his years at Columbia , provide school records, or provide the name of any former classmates or friends while at Columbia …

NOTE: Root graduated as Valedictorian from his high school,
Thornton-Donovan School , then graduated from Columbia University in 1983
as a Political Science major in the same class in which Barack Hussein Obama
states he was.

Some other interesting questions…

Why was Obama’s law license inactivated in 2002?

Why was Michelle’s law license inactivated by Court Order?

It is circulating that according to the U.S. Census,
there is only one Barack Obama
but 27 Social Security numbers and over 80 aliases.
WHAT!! ???
The Social Security number he uses now originated in Connecticut where he is never reported to have lived.

No wonder all his records are sealed!

Please continue sending this out to everyone.
Somewhere, someone had to know him in school… before he
“reorganized” Chicago & burst upon the scene at the
2004 Democratic Convention & made us swoon with his charm,
poise & speaking pizzazz.

 
 

This video was released by Vance AFB the day we got Bin Laden.
Caution: it’ll restore your pride in the USA and get your blood stirring.
Funny how it takes the military to do that; politicians just get us depressed.

 

 

This should work when you are in a hurry.  Worth a try anyway.

Subject: The Magic Green Hat….

 

 

The Magic Green Hat

The other day I needed to go to the emergency room. 

Not wanting to sit there for 4 hours, I put on my MAGIC GREEN HAT. 

When I went into the E. R., I noticed that 3/4 of the people got up and left. 

I guess they decided that they weren’t that sick after all. 

Cut at least 3 hours off my waiting time.

Here’s the hat:

It also works at the local DMV.  I cleared that place out in about 45 seconds and it saved me 5 hours. 

At the Laundromat, three minutes after entering, I had my choice of any machine, most still running.

But…don’t try it at McDonald’s.  The whole crew left and l never got my order…

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